Scream of My Mind

I’ve been called a weak woman for my inability to hold back my tears and a pussy to my own fucked up mind once,

and since then I have difficulties to determine what the hell should I do about my  emotions.

Screw you, crazy ex bf! Go fuck up with other girls’ life.

Ever feel when all you want is to cry but then you second guess yourself by asking, “should I cry about this? Is it okay, if I cry about this? Am I too weak for crying about this?” ?
Ever feel when you feel something build up inside you, then you ask yourself whether is it okay to feel those feelings?

It hurts, and sometimes I began to think, “suck it up, and be stronger.”

No more being a pussy to my own life, no more being a tear jerk.


But let me remind you,

I ain’t either Spock or an emotionless human. Though even Spock feels emotion but rather not showing it.

I raised with the sensitivity to feel all kind of emotion. That’s one of  the reason this blog even exist.

This loneliness starts screwing myself up, I guess. And yet, now I wonder to myself again, “is it wrong to feel lonely?”


About ayundazikrina

Woman with dreams
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