“Please don’t see just a girl caught up in dreams and fantasies. Please see me, reaching out for someone I can’t see.”
How have you been?
It’s barely a week and I think I have missed you a little too much.
I miss all the moment we’ve shared
Feels like looking at your picture isn’t enough.
I can still remember on our last 2 days together and you’re lying next to me.
I have to hold the urge to brush my hand over your head and tell you what I feel.
About how happy I am that our path crossed, on how lucky I am to get to know you better.
To know the side of you that not much people in the group knows.
To be honest, meeting you and get to know you has given me a strength.
I used to be a weak girl that has so much to say about her past.
But then you come and changed me. Changed me the way I want to be changed.
Change me into a better person. Change me to be more positive about my own life.
Change me to be a better muslimah and get closer to Allah.
Your voice in the break of the dawn as a muadzin is something I always missed.
Being your makmum is something I always cherish.
Laughing at your jokes always made my blood ran a little faster on my veins.
Listening to your opinion on things always opened up my mind.
Looking at you from the distance and how my smile always formed from it is something I want to have a repeat.
Listening and singing the old songs like we used to do is something I always want to do again.
That one moment I got to wake you up from your sleep and found that you’re asleep with the sound of Al-Quran’s reading next to you is something I adore.
Your company at dawn when I washed the laundry is something I used to wait for.
That moment I fixed the scar in your back is the moment I felt my hand trembles from the nerve feeling you sent.
And all other moments we shared, I always remember.
Didn’t I promise you one thing from my previous note?
That whenever I missed you, I’ll pray.
Allah knows better about us, yes?
In fact, what I feel right now, I believe it is because of Allah.
For every salam I sent to you in my prayer, for every time I whisper your name (sometimes a little louder) in my prayer…
Soft shady brown eyes, I miss you…
“Don’t you dare let our best memories bring you sorrow. Yesterday I saw a lion kissed a deer.”